No Naked Butts on the Furniture!

No naked butts on the furniture. It’s an actual rule that I had to implement in our home. There are certain things no one can ever prepare you for when it comes to being a parent. Having to implement rules like this is one of them. But lo and behold, the boys broke out naked handstands one day and from that day was born the no naked butts on the furniture rule.

This post is going to take a sharp left turn I wasn’t originally planning for. It was supposed to be lighthearted and funny. All the goofy and funny things no one can prepare you for when it comes to being a parent. I plan for my posts to go up every Tuesday. And then this past Tuesday* happened and we all had to watch (again) the lives of so many shatter in front of our eyes. Since then, I’ve spiraled a bit**. I can’t quite say why this time (we’ve seen so many at this point) hit me so hard. I’m hoping putting words to paper can help me process this all in a more productive way. Because the tears of this past week have been fast and furious and far more than expected.

Another school shooting. More children sacrificed for the sake of someone’s ability to hold tight onto their bullets. Weapons somehow continue to carry more weight in our society than the lives of our children. In these first eight months of 2025, we’ve seen 44*** school shootings (according to CNN). If history repeats itself, then we are not even done yet for the year based on the fact that 2024 saw 83 incidents.

Tuesday was the boys first day of school for the year. Our boys came home that day. Other families did not have that same experience. There are certain things no one can ever prepare you for when it comes to being a parent. Knowing you got to pick up your kids from school, while others did not, is one of those things.

Seeing the picture of the mom, shoes in hand, running down the street towards the school, towards her children, without knowledge of whether they were safe or not is altogether mind-numbingly, wildly, heart-wrenchingly, distressing. I would run barefoot, over broken glass to my boys. That’s what this mom was doing. I guarantee you the pain of every rock or stick or stubbed toe moment went unnoticed because the pain and anguish of not knowing whether you’ll hug your child at the end of that run or have to say goodbye forever is an all encompassing pain that outweighs any physical pain this world could create.

And yet, here we are, once again. Parents having to say goodbye to their children because they sent their kids to school. Children and teachers who will forever be haunted by the terror they witnessed that day. Yet, having to return to a classroom again with nothing different in place to ensure they never have to experience that again.

I think all the words that could be said about these situations have been spoken by dozens, hundreds, thousands at this point. My words are not going to change anything. At this point, I don’t know what will. I know that the fear of sending my kids to school is real and raw each and every day. I know that we carry on as parents, making dinners and asking questions about their day, scheduling doctor’s appointments, buying new clothes to replace the pants that are somehow three inches too short overnight, buying the 10th new pair of shoe this year since their squished little feet have somehow outgrown the last pair in 6 weeks and we do it all while pushing down and hiding the fear that lingers in every fiber of our being.

This post is going to be short. Not short and sweet. Just short. I have been holding onto these words for week and although I’m not convinced the words are anything but foggy, I think I have to send them off into the ether in hopes that releasing them takes the slightest bit of weight off my shoulders. This is me sending them off most likely incomplete and possibly incoherent but needing to do so.

*I started this weeks ago clearly since last Tuesday wasn’t last Tuesday in Minneapolis. And since that date there have been a number of additional school shootings. One was at a campus very near to us. Another incident was thwarted because the 18 year-old was arrested after his plan to shoot up his school was uncovered. That was also at a location not that very from us. It feels like the walls are closing in and the distance each of these incidents occur decreases every time.

**The spiral has increased. A lot a bit.

***47. The number of school shootings is now up to 47 and I only started this blog a few weeks ago. That number should be zero but here we are with an additional 3 in just a matter of days.